Thursday, October 1, 2009

Dog the Bounty Hunter: Polanski Episode


You been runnin' a long time Bra'.


Yeah Bra'. My Dog sniffed you out. You're in the dog house now. You ain't gonna hound nobody no more.


I'm gonna need you to turn yourself in.


What you mean turn myself in? I am highly regarded director.


PUT THE ICE DOWN! PUT THE ICE DOWN! PUT IT DOWN NOW!!


Leland, take it easy. You won't need pepper spray for this job.


Okay, I put iced tea on table to calm nerves of angry cave man. What is this circus?


There's a bounty on your head my man. You have to change your ways. Face the music. When you cut the legs off a piano, the music doesn't sound the same.


What means your metaphor?


You've been Roman around too long.


You with puns. You always stand with hands on hips.


No I don't.


Yes you do. You are doing it again.


No I'm not.


I have had hard life. I am not permission to enter United States for concert of my friend R. Kelly. Do you know agony of not having Nathan's hot dog on Coney Island Boardwalk? (Sob!)


I most certainly do. Come here. Give me a hug. Get in the SUV, and we'll give you a cigarette and say a prayer for you.


(sniff) Thank you. I hope to receiving pardon from your fat, American God.


No chance of that my brother. But glad to have you on the show. Sigh...It's a tough job, but somebody's gotta do it.


Doggone right!

For old time's sake, here's my post on when Dog let the N-word fly free like an American Flag.

2 comments:

Comedian Luke said...

ON THE GROUND MOTHERF***ER! *smokers cough* This Dog just got a bone.

Abbi Crutchfield said...

LOL!