Friday, November 14, 2008

Who Knows Best? Brazen Comic vs. Self-Deprecating Comic

Curly Comedy sits down with two performing stereotypes to interview them on their technique.

On mother jokes

Brazen Comic: Ohmygawd. If I couldn’t joke about that woman I’d have strangled her with the cord to her Conair by now. “Judy Kleiman’s son is a doctah now. You should give him a kawl.” Whaddya want Ma? You want me to marry a doctor and become an alcoholic by the time I’m 40? I did an episode a ER playin’ Anthony Edwards’ love interest once. I says I ain’t datin’ a doctor but I schtupp one on TV!”

Self-Deprecating Comic: My mother had an odd sense of humor. She told me to eat my vitamins so I could grow big and strong. I asked her why she didn’t eat vitamins. She said she hates the taste of Tylenol. But Munchausen syndrome has its perks. I got more flowers than any other girl in school. And senior year I was voted most likely to succeed. Or maybe suck seeds through a straw.

On women not being funny

Brazen Comic: What a bunch of crap! You want proof? I’m a woman (pause) and I just farted. BOO YAH.

Self-Deprecating Comic: Well that sounds sexist. So is the myth that all women are graceful. I’m so clumsy I can’t even put pantyhose on right. I jam my leg in, and yank the nylon up to my chest. Ten minutes later, the crotch has fallen to my knees, and it’s March of the Penguins to get the morning paper.

On smoking in clubs

Self-Deprecating Comic: I hate the smell of cigarette smoke in clubs. It reminds me of when I used to work at a bowling alley in El Paso. The nicest thing my manager ever told me was that I was “of use” there. We had an award for Most Valuable Asset, and by two votes I beat out toilet paper.

Brazen Comic: Cigarettes are like Doritos. They make your breath stink, but you gotta have one after sex! Shake your thighs if you feel me, ladies! If comedy clubs take away people’s right to smoke they’re gonna take booze away next. And a comedy show without booze is nothin’ but an AA Meeting!

On long distance dating while working the road

Self-Deprecating Comic: I don’t date.

Brazen Comic: Interracial dating is the new gay man. It was deplored, and then taboo, now it’s mod and you see it everywhere on TV. I’m for it. If I weren’t, I’d owe my kids an explanation! What’s that? Oh, you said long distance. You gotta speak up, Hon’. (Picks up roll of paper towels, shouts in tube to make trumpet noises) How can you be appreciated if no one can hear you?

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