Wednesday, November 7, 2007

It Was a Dark and Stormy Night...

There are three remaining weeks for you to bang out the world's worst novel!

November is National Novel Writing Month, and I have joined to take part. I'd like to infuse some bootcamp discipline with my writing style, and I'd like you to join me. The whole goal of this program is to encourage people to be enthusiastic and work on their output and follow-through. "The kamikaze approach forces you to lower your expectations, take risks, and write on the fly."

It's your chance to be like Kobayashi (without the intestinal damage)!

I chose to write the genre I spent my entire youth reading: mystery/suspense. I only have 616 out of 50,000 words finished, but that's because I keep trying to make it funny. Blame it on Clue. It takes place in an Indiana murder mystery theater called the Hoodunnit Hotel, from the point of view of one of their disgruntled performers. Here's the beginning of Three Scary Deaths and A Real One:

A room full of twenty people means the show will go on, even if half of them are teenagers who would rather be caught in the current rain storm than be dragged to a dinner theater performance. Families come to celebrate a forty-seventh birthday, encourage their daughter’s theatrical side or to make up for lack of communication with each other. Couples come to celebrate nuptials, find that spark again or to make up for lack of communication with each other. I look through the dressing room door and down the hallway to where the line of patrons starts. Out of view, it continues down a winding staircase that leads to the lobby bar, where some take their final swigs before the fun begins. I pity the couples with matching sweaters. “Fools,” I mutter as I slip on a pair of overalls and tie a rubber chicken to my head.

Hey, if skill, research and dignity are holding you back, I think there's a book you need to look into.

They don't even have opposable thumbs to hold a brush.

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