Roots

Not just a great story.

A fashion statement.

It’s like Scary Spice and I have the same stylist. “This season, never leave home without a black top, silver hoop earrings, a white smile and a clash of colors on the head.”

Our lives our more parallel than you might think. For instance, I have two pairs of sunglasses from different vendors who ignore me whenever I come to complain about the merchandise. Get it?

I do a lot of bragging about my sunglasses at first then often neglect them until they’re damaged. Get it?

Even though I can afford to repair them and get new ones I still try to haggle with the guy who gave me my last pair so he’ll reimburse me. He has so many already! Why shouldn’t he front the cost? I wouldn’t have them if I didn’t run into him anyway. You follow?

(I raise a bottle of root beer)

Here’s to you, Mel B...

(I swig)

Don’t sit on ‘em.