Thursday, March 5, 2009

Have Your People Write My People

Take time today to write your sponsored child! Your letters will establish a special relationship between you and the child you sponsor.

The envelope is marked, "Message from Your Sponsored Child". There is the Ethiopian version on the left, and the translated version on the right. Apparently my kid is too young to write in Ethiopian. Or he is a pampered prince whose royal secretary does all of his correspondence.

How I celebrated / will celebrate Christmas:
Dear Sponsor, he celebrated Christmas at Church together with his friends and with happiness.

Question for my sponsor:
Do you have preparation in Church for Christmas?

Please pray:
He wants you to pray about his family. Good bye.

Sincerely: (child's name)
Signed by: (writer's initials, if not written by the child)
Translated by: (some other person's initials)

I wish my name actually were Sponsor (like the famous actor Sponsor Tracy), because then they'd have to find something else to call me to make me feel more removed. For all I know the child may never get my thoughtful, newsy letters because his translator doesn't feel like sitting that long. Or maybe it's my tiny pen pal who can't sit still. "Come here child. It is time to hear from the American. Put down that soccer ball. She had a good comedy show the night she sent this, three months ago. Don't you make faces at me. She is worried that her material is not relatable. She wants to know if you have heard of the Sham Wow. Child! Come back here!"

Dear Pen Pal,
Your sponsor does not think you read her letters. She says either your writer is a cold fish or your translator is underpaid. She is going to learn Ethiopian to see if any humor from your writer is getting lost on the translator. Perhaps it is the Organization that serves as a third filter wringing the letters dry of their warmth, empathy and humanity. She will hide a test word somewhere in here to see if it gets through.
Good fart.

1 comment:

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