Friday, January 4, 2008

Cooking with Abbi



The meal pictured above is what I served for dinner last night. It is

A) a combination of leftovers, baby food and garbage
B) a plate of Beneful, the meat and vegetables dogfood
C) a chicken dinner attacked by Slimer, as I have an uncontrollable ghost problem in the house.

If you chose any of those answers you would be RUDE. A good guesser, but gauche nonetheless. That hot plate of shiny food is my attempt at Indian cuisine. My "Tandoori" is a stovetop, and my seasoning of choice is McCormicks for Poultry. The light green stuff is curried couscous with raisins and toasted (BURNED) almonds. The slime is spinach and cheese that comes in a bag that you boil. The edible part is a piece of pita bread. Also known as Naan in my imagination.

How did it taste? Considering that two thirds of the meal was instant, and also pre-cooked, I based the crux of my analysis on the chicken. It wasn't dry, it wasn't expired (I get busy sometimes), but it was only so-so. Perhaps that's because I have not mastered the art of marinating meat. By "art" I mean the forethought to put salad dressing on the chicken while it's in the fridge.

The couscous smelled like pepper, and that's what I get for adding a teaspoon instead of a couple of dashes. What's a teaspoon matter? Put a teaspoon of water on your tuft of cotton candy and get back to me.

The spinach was good, but only when I dipped the bread in it. Maybe that's because I like my soup in a bowl, not running all over my plate. What's a bowl matter? Try to take a bath by hosing down your garage floor and get back to me.

I'm trying to save money by cooking at home instead of eating out so much. I think a sign of its level of difficulty is that I have invited myself to a friend's house for dinner tonight. Thank goodness tomorrow is Saturday, which is always a good excuse to order pizza. What's a pizza matter? Imagine eating the above picture for the rest of your life and get back to me.

2 comments:

Phaea C. said...

I thought it looks delicious. Is that wrong??

Abbi Crutchfield said...

No, you clearly have an advanced palate, and that is nothing to be ashamed of. PS: Luke ate it and the leftovers.