Thursday, February 26, 2009

Ask Abbi: Top Five Schtick Flicks

Chris of writes:

What are your top 5 favorite comedy movies?

#5: The Princess Bride (1987)

What this says about me: I'm a romantic. I put romance before comedy. But I also put grandparents before romance. And video games before grandparents. I peeked into my older cousin's room while she watched this with her friend, and it forever became the movie that meant I'd be as cool as my cousin when I saw it. Then after I saw it, I couldn't wait until I understood all the jokes. Or anything Andre the Giant said.

#4: The Jerk (1979)

What this says about me: I love Steve Martin. But I don't love dated references and disco soundtracks enough to make this my favorite comedy of all time. As a kid, this movie tied in my brain with Three Amigos, Little Shop of Horrors, and Roxeanne, also known as whatever Steve Martin is in. So it does not exactly signify comedic brilliance at an early age. It's just the one that made me laugh the hardest. "He hates these cans! Get away from the cans!"

#3: Coming to America (1988)

What this says about me: I want to knock Samuel L. Jackson on his butt with a mop handle for making Lakeview Terrace. And if you're really a prince, I'll marry you.

#2" So I Married An Axe Murderer (1993)

What this says about me: I think Anthony LaPaglia missed his calling as a comedic sidekick. He needs to stop wasting time as a serious cop with a fake Brooklyn accent and start wearing pimp suits, getting punked by Charles Grodin and being frightened by Steven Wright...while speaking with a fake Brooklyn accent.

#1: Clue (1985)

What this says about me: I am thrilled and delighted by murder-mystery comedies. I grew up on them in 30-minute televised installments. Angela Fletcher, Benjamin Matlock...ever since Columbo made it okay to laugh at blood stains on shag carpet. I just couldn't fit Haunted Honeymoon (1986) and Murder by Death (1976) on here, because they need to be saved for Top 5 Murder-Mystery Comedies that Take Place in a Mansion. I also reserved Chevy Chase and Bill Murray for top 5 Christmas Comedies. Then there are the Top 5 Muppet Comedies, the Top 5 Julia Roberts Dramadies...

Feel free to post your questions for Abbi in the comments section, to be answered in a later post, or write curlycomedy (at) with "Ask Abbi" in the Subject.

Tuesday, February 24, 2009

Michelle Obama's 3rd Weekly Address

The First Lady wastes no time in sharing her feelings on the controversial cartoon in the New York Post. Using the White House Resurrecting Chamber, she invites an old favorite personality to give his two cents.

Don't forget to vote it FUNNY when it's done, and then share it with your friends who love Hollywood Squares.

Sunday, February 22, 2009

You Like Me! You Really Like Me!

I am hosting games at an Oscar Party tonight. Who said the following during their Oscar Win? Put your answers in the Comments.

A) “We like non-fiction, and we live in fictitious times. We live in a time where we have fictitious election results that elect a fictitious president. We live in a time where we have a man sending us to war for fictitious reasons. Whether it’s the fiction of duct tape or the fictitious of orange alerts. We are against this war Mr. Bush! Shame on you Mr. Bush! Shame on you!”

B) “You know when you grow up in the suburbs of Sydney... a dream like this seems kind of vaguely ludicrous and completely unattainable. But this moment is directly connected to those childhood imaginings. And for anybody who’s on the downside of advantage and relying purely on’s possible.”

C) “Uh, here we go, okay, the studio, I love you, and Cameron Crowe, and Tom Cruise, I love you brother! I love you man! Dereck Broach, Sean Settles, uh, Keith Butler, all my behind-the-scenes crew, Regina King, I love you! You did a great job when we made the movie! Everybody involved with the movie I love you!”

D) “Losing would suck and winning would be really scary. And it’s really, really scary! You know we’re really just two young guys who were fortunate enough to be involved with a lot of great people, whom it’s coming upon us—there’s no way we’re doing this in 20 seconds.”

E) “Mom, Dad, there is no way that I can express to you what I’m feeling right now—my heart is full to bursting—except to say, I’m the king of the world! WOO!”

F) “And also I would like to thank my parents in Vergaio, a little village in Italy. They gave me the biggest gift: poverty."


A) 2003
B) 2001
C) 1997
D) 1998
E) 1998
F) 1999

Friday, February 20, 2009

Joaquin Phoenix Comes Clean

Michelle Obama interrupts her weekly address to welcome a visitor to the White House, actor-turned-non-actor-turned-rapper-turned-mountan man, Joaquin Phoenix. In this exclusive, behind-the-scenes meeting he addresses his choice to change his public image. Finally! Some answers!

Don't forget to vote it FUNNY if you liked it! And share it with your jaded, Hollywood big-shot friends.

Thursday, February 19, 2009

Michelle Obama's 2nd Weekly Address

In this week's installment, the First Lady celebrates the possibilities of a stimulus package, unveils her alter-ego, and comes clean about her celebrity look-alike.

Don't forget to vote it FUNNY if you liked it! Think of it as your duty to your country.

Wednesday, February 18, 2009

Elizabeth Alexander: Behind the Poem

Seriously, was Maya Angelou busy that day?

filmed at Delusions of Spandex show
Parkside Lounge
317 E. Houston St @ Attorney
Monthly on Saturday at 7:00PM

Monday, February 16, 2009

Scamdog Millionaire

Celebrate a belated Valentine's Day with everyone's favorite Southeast Asian love story. Then follow that with a sketch parody of the film.

With Luke Thayer and Mo Diggs
filmed at Delusions of Spandex show
Parkside Lounge
317 E. Houston St @ Attorney
Monthly on Saturday at 7:00PM

Friday, February 13, 2009

Ask Abbi: Why Comedy?

Slava of Stand-Up Comedy 101 writes:

Why did you start doing stand-up comedy?

This is an actual interview that you may read in its entirety here (Don't forget to leave some feedback). But the long and the short of it is to show my husband and two kids that I am not just a frumpy housewife, and that I can genuinely make people laugh. Okay I stole that reason from Punchline. But it turns out I had the same aspirations as Sally Field's character in that movie. I wanted to prove myself. Especially after several attempts at stand-up that didn't count as real attempts because there was either no jokes, no microphone or no audience. Sally Field's character gets help and encouragement from a fellow comedian played by Tom Hanks. A funny young man hit all the open mics with me and supported my every effort, but unlike the film, he did NOT blank on stage in front of his father or have a mental breakdown in the rain when I rejected him. I did not reject him. In fact, we are going to get married. I did, however, get a horrible haircut early in my career.

Feel free to post your questions for Abbi in the comments section, to be answered in a later post, or write curlycomedy (at) with "Ask Abbi" in the Subject.

Photo credit:

Thursday, February 12, 2009

Michelle Obama's Weekly Address

Personally I'd rather hear the goings-on in the White House from a First Lady's perspective.

Vote it FUNNY! Or you die.

Tuesday, February 10, 2009

Chris Brawn

Thanks to his slugging average, the recently arrested Chris Brown's picture can be added to the list of celebrity Thug Shots. A thug shot is the unexpected (or perfectly timed) mug shot that turns your squeaky clean image into hardcore and therefore boosts record sales. Who listened to "So Sick" the same after Neyo mean-mugged?

But remember, just because you're a famous musician with a catchy name like Brown doesn't mean the plan is fool-proof. It doesn't always work to your advantage.

Monday, February 9, 2009

Gramtastic II

I don't know who I'm more in love with after this year's Grammys.

Kanye West for boldly sporting a forehead-to-neck pompador, the likes of which we haven't seen since Ozone's protege Turbo electrically boogalooed with a broom.

Get outta my dreams and into my car, Mr. West! For more observations on the 'do (and the don't).

Or M.I.A. who took "I don't give a flip" to a new level with a polka dot bikini stretched with see-through black material over a 9-month pregnant belly. She waddled to the beat of "Paper Planes" and pointed to her fans with all of the bravado of a non-pregnant Jay-Z.

Put away the primrose oil. She's inducing labor the old-fashioned way, by rapping hardcore, Amy Poehler-style.

I always admire people who are impervious to shame. Maybe it's the natural way of the performer. Like if they weren't famous, they'd still be doing this on the subway. They're my new heroes.

Wednesday, February 4, 2009

Dating Advice on

Just in time for Valentine's Day! I was recently interviewed in an article on called, Dating Advice from Improv Comedians.

Because when you think of dating skills, you think of me.

Kerry True, Environmentalist

Nerve: What's the best way to attract an improv comedian?

Abbi: Show an interest in the performing arts and be genuine. Or tie fishing wire to a can of PBR.

Click here to read the whole article. Luke offers advice too! For the record, when I attract people, I resort to old-fashioned monkey mating calls. When people reach out to shake my hand I turn slightly and offer my rump. If it ain't broke, don't fix it.